Comparing Gifts


The season of giving is upon us. What is the best gift you ever received? Take a moment to think about this gift. How did it feel to receive it?

Have you ever compared a gift you received with a gift someone else received at the same time? Maybe secretly wishing you had been given something different?

This comparison comes easily in today’s society…comparing jobs, comparing bodies, comparing status, etc.

Case in point, here is a short paragraph from a blog I wrote a couple years ago.

“I used to compare myself with everyone. I wanted those thighs, to be as strong as her, as fast as that one over there. I spent 30-40 hours a week, for over the last 30 years, in gyms and fitness centers comparing myself to others. Feeling like I could not measure up, feeling not good enough, not strong enough, not thin enough. Treating my body poorly and beating myself up verbally, because I couldn’t look the way I thought I HAD to or SHOULD.”

Why is it that we compare ourselves to others? Do we truly want to be someone else?

  • Live in someone else’s body?
  • Have someone else’s thighs?
  • Have someone else’s thoughts?
  • Someone else’s family?
  • Someone else’s problems?
  • Someone else’s successes?

Society today bombards you with perfect images…perfect airbrushed bodies in magazines…on billboards, on TV and on social media. You cannot escape it. The exposure is daily, and endless.

Society also pushes you to “work hard”, “get married”, “get a successful job”, “make a lot of money”, “be a good parent”…and so on.

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No wonder the stress in this country continues to rise. This hard work doesn’t seem to matter. It doesn’t seem to be enough.

If you are making money and have a good job, but are at an unhealthy weight, or don’t have a family, somehow you have failed.

So what do you do? You compare yourself to others who have what you don’t, while being unaware of the multiple things that you have that this other person doesn’t.

What is it that you see in others that you think you need?

  • A better body?
  • More successful job?
  • More money?
  • A supportive partner?

Ask yourself honestly, would having her body actually change your life? What would change? Do you know that for sure?

Would being able to have that job make your life better? Do you know that for sure?

Isn’t it time to DECLARE A TRUCE?

A truce so that you can begin the search for peace, peace in your heart, your mind, your belly and your body.

It’s time to accept the wonder and truth of your own thoughts, success and failures.

Time to realize that YOU ARE HUMAN, AND that you are an amazing GIFT.

Time to understand and accept that you are not supposed to be perfect. You are only supposed to be your best self and give your best efforts.

Have you ever thought that NO ONE in this world has, or will ever have, your own special and unique gene pool in conjunction with your own individual experiences in life?

What a wonderful gift this is – YOU are the only one who can play the lead in the story of you.

This holiday season, step into yourself, play hard as you. Stop comparing your hair with the woman standing in front of you at the supermarket, the thighs of the woman on the treadmill next to you or the body of the woman in the cubicle behind you. Be proud of what is yours and take ownership of it.

As a gift to yourself this year, try this:

Look at yourself in the mirror, and list at least 10 things you like about yourself! Gifts that are yours…It could be anything…

Here is an example.

My smile, my laugh, my strength, my dedication, my empathetic nature, I am a good listener, my stamina, I like to hug, I like to share, my new knee.

Post it below, hang it on your bathroom mirror, post it on your fridge or in your car.

Try to treat this GOOD GIFT that is you, just like you would the best gift you ever received.

3 responses to “Comparing Gifts”

  1. lyn dailey says:

    Hi, yeah, if i had a great body, id just ruin it anyway….i have to, i have to make sure i fail. its expected. my x said to me. “if i were in a bar, id never look at you twice”, “youre not the person i married”, and “youve let yourself go”. i can be thankful, i have a supportive man now, he wants me healthy. sure, appropriate weight is great, but when i get there each time, and feel great…sure enough, it all goes to hell. i make sure of it. ok, enough whining. the best gift came from my dad, several of them. the best gift was having him, hes gone now and i miss him awfully. i wished id been more loving, less troubled….less selfish. he was my knight. onward, ill bounce back, i always do. a good thing about me?…i just dont quit, but i think i like starting over, over and over…lol

  2. Danielle says:

    I think my eyes are beautiful, especially when I wear green. I have a great sense of humor (sometimes to the annoyance of my DH). And I wish I could see myself through my childrens’ eyes because they seem to love me no matter what I look like.

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About the Author

Anne Poirier, BS, CSCS, CIEC

Former Program Director at Green Mountain | Program Director at Shaping Perspectives - A Woman’s Way to Joy

By sharing experiences and lessons learned through her writing, Anne’s goal is to first, help women finally feel free enough to break away from their dieting chains and learn how to listen and honor their body’s internal cues. Second, to discover and experience more joy in moving their bodies and finally, understand the importance of taking time for themselves. Her philosophy of strengthening the connections among participants’ minds, hearts and bodies fits perfectly with Green Mountain’s philosophy of lasting change through comprehensive, integrative health programming. Anne is the Program Director at Shaping Perspectives - A Woman’s Way to Joy and former Program Director at Green Mountain at Fox Run.

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