Getting the Support We Need

Do we sabotage our success by soliciting negative feedback?

Staying healthy isn't just about eating right or physical activity. It’s also about openly enlisting the support we need to help with weight loss.

In other words, the classic question, "Does this outfit make me look fat?" isn't doing us any good. Instead, it feeds a negative cycle that often starts in our own minds. How do we combat this negative cycle?

"First, we need to become really clear about what we want," says Teri Hirss, behavior specialist at Green Mountain at Fox Run. Only then, when we've discovered what our needs are, can we communicate them to others.

What type of support works best?

• A daily phone call with a close friend?
• A long walk after a difficult day?
• A romantic dinner with your sweetie at least once a month?
   

Knowing the type of support you'll need makes it easier to plan ahead for times when you'll feel overwhelmed or discouraged. Make a standing date for dinner or call a group of friends together. If they're not getting the hint, tell them directly what you need and why.

We can’t expect others to know what we need when we aren't clear ourselves. When we slow down and think, we may start to see how often we sabotage ourselves by looking for external validation. When we become aware of these old patterns, we can reframe them into newer, healthier ways of getting our needs met.