When Your Support System Just Doesn’t “Get” Mindful Eating

When Your Support System Just Doesn't Get Mindful EatingThe enthusiasm has been slowly declining around here.

Well, not enthusiasm so much as commitment.

Exercising has become a must for my daily routine, an automatic inclusion in my day that, as a stand-alone, is an amazing improvement from my pre-Green Mountain routine, which I’ll admit, included almost no body movement at all. So that’s a good thing!

And it is something that has become routine, appreciated and pleasant for me so I know it will remain, barring any more injuries, as an important part of my life.

Good food choices are a staple owing to knowledge about nutrition and the role of balancing food groups that I learned at Green Mountain.

As for mindful eating, that one has been a little harder to engrain because, to be honest, I haven’t made the commitment to annoy my husband.

Convincing Loved Ones that “Mindful Eating” Works

Ah, the husband piece of this journey. Remember, he was the guy last fall that was completely supportive? The guy who, when I admitted bingeing, preached self-forgiveness and lent encouragement? The one who agreed to eat the foods I choose to prepare for dinner, the way I choose to prepare them?

Related Article: Wow! You’ve Lost Weight!

Yeah, that guy. He left town. He has had enough of “all this silliness” (his words, not mine) because now, some 9 months after I completed my stay at Green Mountain, I am not svelte. “Why are you going back there? You haven’t lost any weight! It was a waste of money.”

And we’re back to dinners where he eats his at break-neck speed and then stares at me as I try to eat mindfully so that I can stew, get upset, wolf down the rest and clear the plates.

See, here’s the thing, I gave him the support materials upon my return and I thought he understood that I am on a journey to health, emotionally, psychologically and physically, and no one ever said that that journey would make me look 25 again.

At least I never said that. Maybe that’s what he heard between what he now calls all the “silliness”. And, by the way, I have lost weight and a size and, most importantly, feel soooo much better!

But I am not in a bikini, that’s for sure. Is that really what he expected? (Though you can absolutely look and feel great in a bikini without losing weight.)

What I’ve Learned From My Husband’s Lack of “Mindful Eating” Support

You all know that I am always looking for the learning in this process so here’s what I’ve determined is the take-away from this marital befuddlement: Husband doesn’t get it, but I do.

Husband doesn’t have to do the work, I do.

Husband is not responsible for my health and wellbeing, I am.

And, lastly, husband can’t upset me, derail me or deride me unless I allow him. And I simply won’t.

That doesn’t mean I have to be unkind or judgmental, it just means I have to continue to stick to what I know is best for my body and me.  

So what if he thinks this is all “silliness” because I’m not a size 4. He was supportive for the first few months, when I was working hard to put all my learning in place, and for that I am grateful. But I’ve got this now. I’m good.


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