Food Addiction, Part III: Saying No to Old Ways

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woman on beachA continuation of the article Food Addiction Part II: Knowing When to Lick Our Wounds.

Moving out of using food to cope, finding ways out of using food or eating or obsessing about it all as addictive strategies requires a major paradigm shift – and a boatload of courage. And a little (or sometimes more) support doesn’t hurt either.

Saying “no” to the old ways may mean saying “no”… period.

You will need to begin to say no to those things that drain you.

That means the people, the people-pleasing and perfectionism.

It will mean saying no to putting everyone’s needs ahead of your own, and beginning to put some Daily Essentials in place to stay filled up and nourish yourself in new reliable ways.

It will mean paying attention to any kind of pain you’re in. If you think about what this means for you, right now in this moment, you might jot down 3 situations where you are in pain. Feel free to define pain in whatever way you need to, but pay attention, this is your life we’re talking about.

What about the foods that drain you or keep you in pain? You probably know what they are, right? And yet so many times we believe we have no capacity, no power to choose better. Is that true and is that really how you want to see yourself?

What I can tell you, what I know for sure and see over and over with the women who I work with, is that it’s so much more painful to feel helpless and to continue in these painful patterns that don’t support you. It’s way more demoralizing to continue to ignore the ways your body, your heart, and your mind want to help you make the shifts that make the difference. Part of you already knows this.

Sometimes it just takes a little bit of “permission” from yourself, or maybe somebody else who can hear you and give you perspective that making these changes will free you in ways that you might not even be able to imagine yet.

You are meant to be fully and wholly who you are. A bright light – free to share your gifts with your head up. When you are swirling in any addictive patterns around food and eating behaviors, it’s hard to feel that way, hard to even want to show up that way.

But it can only get better… you’re going to have to trust me on this.

Want to talk more? Have some thoughts to share or a question? I’d love to hear your comments below. What I know from doing this work for 25 years and from my time working at Green Mountain is that we are stronger together.

I want that for you.

Green Mountain will be holding the workshop “Why Can’t I Stop Overeating: Breaking Through Food Addiction” from December 5-8, 2014.

4 Responses (Add Yours)

  • Harriet Krivit says:

    DEAR LISA, (CAPS FOR THAT’S HOW IMPORTANT OR SHOULD I SAY IMPERATIVE THIS IS!)
    WHAT’S THE SONG? “WHO CAN I TURN TO?” I SPENT A MONTH AT GREEN MT. IN THE LATE 70′S. SO MANY WOMEN HAVE STAYED AT G.M. SINCE THEN. WHERE ARE THEY? YOU PROBABLY WON’T HEAR FROM ONE’S STILL STRUGGLING. THAT’S THE GUILT THING SO OFTEN REFERRED TO. NEED AN OPEN 24/7 SIMPLE-TO-GET-ON FOR G.MER’S E-MAIL SITE. SEND A NOTICE TO EVERYONE WHO’S EVER BEEN AT G.M. FROM A WEEKEND TO A MONTH. WE NEED NUMBER’S FOR EVERYONE HAS THEIR OWN TIME CONSTRAINTS. THE SITE SHOULD BE NON-JUDGEMENTAL OR ADVICE GIVING…JUST RELATING AND SHARING WHATEVER THE NEED RE:FOOD/EATING/WEIGHT/SIZE/MOOD OR MIND SET…WHATEVER, BUT SPECIFIC TO THIS ISSUE. PASSWORD NAMES WILL KEEP IT PRIVATE IF ONE SO CHOOSES.
    THERE’S NOTHING OUT THERE RIGHT NOW…ALL “MISSING THE BOAT”. GOOD PART OF MY WORK AT NYMAG FOR 10 YRS. WAS RESEARCH ALONG WITH WRITING ETC.
    WARM AND HOPEFUL REGARDS, HARRIET

    • Hi Harriet- We are with you. Thinking about all sorts of options to support past participants, those who are struggling and those who just want the connection with others who have shared the experience and subscribed to the GM way of living. Thanks for writing..appreciate your request and recommendation..

  • Emily says:

    So interesting to try some of these lists. I could only do a week at GM and so feel a little not sure of my steering around the one where we were to list the kinds of foods that make us feel bad…because I think it’s not so much the foods themselves but how I’m eating/pattern of irregular eating that feels more like the culprit to the feeling of being “stuck” when I feel, as you put it so beautifully, “swirling in addictive patterns.” Anyway. I feel pretty stuck physically, but if I measure change in healthy behaviors I’ve added to my life since GM, I’ve come quite a long way.

    • Hi Emily- the list is for you.. just to get a sense of all of the things that are and are not the best fit for you, whether people, food, situations.. what do you know about what truly supports you versus drains or triggers you And yes.. I agree, often it is the emotional energy or the thought patterns and the “how” of the eating that can create the “swirl”. Measuring change via healthy habits is the way to go…they matter and will feel better which is essential. I’m cheering you on from here.

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