Low Self Esteem Getting You Down? Think about Yourself in a Positive Way!
Afraid that you'll sound like you're tooting your own horn? Not to worry. It gets easier once you put the spotlight on positive behaviors and let yourself feel good about them.
The braggart is competitive – comparing herself to others. She might show a lack of awareness of others' attributes and accomplishments. This is the person we would say is “self-centered” or “ego-centric.” That's not you.
Here are some #gm KISS(Keep It Simple Sweetheart) small beginnings: Count the positive and mentally pat yourself on the back.
• Notice results of assertiveness – what's different about the responses you get from others?
• Take charge of your feelings by thinking these positive thoughts and let those feelings show
• Take the words “enjoy yourself” to the limit – truly enjoy and appreciate yourself
• Tell someone about a situation you handled successfully – face to face, email, phone, Twitter
• Mention to someone that something you'd been uncertain about turned out well
• You can even give yourself credit for hitting all the traffic lights green
• If you hit all the traffic lights red, use the time to relax and make that a positive
• Use your affirmations
You are your most important audience – look in the mirror. Check your posture. Does it communicate that you care about yourself? Is your head on straight? (Carrying your head off to an angle communicates ambivalence.) Let your happiness show with an easy smile and your satisfaction show in your stride and posture. This is assertive body language. In this way you'll influence the way others see and interact with you and that in turn will add to positive outcomes.
About you as your audience – keep the critic quiet. If positive thoughts don't pop up naturally, sit down a minute and generate a list of three or four positive things. If it takes longer than a minute, stay with it. Maybe you'll have to think of your mother, sister, or friend's attributes that you like and see those in yourself.
Psychologists argue about whether changing our thoughts lead to changes in behavior or whether changing our behavior will cause our thoughts and attitude to follow along. I say it goes both ways. I encourage you to take this two-pronged approach. Notice results.
What is one thing you appreciate about yourself? What would a friend say about you that you would like to hold onto and remember?