Disillusionment can be heartbreaking, especially when we’re disillusioned about a reality that never happened. You imagined yourself somehow different: all-achieving, in control, showing no signs of aging and, gee, it didn’t turn out that way. You feel let down by, what? By your imagined reality?
The first step towards uncovering your personal beliefs is to start noticing your thinking. How are you talking to yourself? Would you talk to anyone else the way you talk to yourself? Do you even know what lines of chatter you are listening to?
Some years ago someone said quite off-handedly that there was a big difference between what you want to be and what you want to do. That notion has resided close to the front of my mind for over thirty years. Oh, I might want to be as strong as I used to be, as effortlessly as it was back then. BUT, I don’t want to do what’s required to achieve the desired results so am stuck with the real reality. It’s my choice whether to be unhappy about my current status or whether to change my imagined reality or the pictures in my head.
Here’s the lesson: The greater the number of and the greater the disparity between expectations and reality, the greater the likelihood that you’ll establish an emotional cache of disillusionment, disappointment, dissatisfaction. Some might call it a feeling of chronic despair.
You can change the pictures your carry around in your head. This is a powerful #gmKISS strategy that will help you decrease the disparity between your expectations and what is happening now. This process allows you move into the present moment and to appreciate what you have. Gathering gratitude lightens the load… of dissatisfaction, and even despair.
Scrutinize your mental archives as you lie back in your warm bath or hot tub. Eyes closed. Inward focus. Find those stored unmet expectations and sort them out. Are there some you now want to commit to? Are there others that need to be deleted and sent to the trash bin? Are your thoughts and images supporting you to take the actions you want to take?
What is one thing you can do or say that can help you let go of self-dissatisfaction? What image can you hold in your head and heart that supports you here and now?